Annabell's Final Academy Months

 

“Ms. Young, come see me after classes today,” Mr. Clemmons said as I walked past his classroom.

“Sure thing,” I called over my shoulder.

I was already pushing it to make it to anatomy on time. I spent too long on the range. I really hated some of the classes. I’d rather spend all my time in weapons training.

I just barely made it in the door on time. Once the doors close, they're sealed. If you didn’t make it in, you missed the class. That wasn’t tolerated here. I thought Blade training had been extreme; this was a different level. Missing class by even seconds meant a meeting with Ms. Roch. She was terrifying. She never yelled, but her presence soaked into your being in a way I’ve never experienced before. I only had to go once. That was more than enough.

“Glad to see you made it, Ms. Young,” Ms. Hellen said.

I flashed her a smile and moved quickly to my seat. Today we were covering bones. I could barely focus. She droned on and on about them. Weak spots, fracture points, striations if you are doing the breaking and mending, field fixes, and survival if you were the target of the breaking. It was all important. I knew I should be paying attention, but weapons were where my heart was.

Finally, the class ended. That was it for the day. I could spend the rest of the evening on the range. First, I had to stop by Mr. Clemmons office. He was one of the advisors. Once you completed the training, his recommendations were heavily weighted for your rankings. Better ranking meant more trust and better placement. It still felt weird to be in a secret school for Garrote training, but I was good at what I did. They all told us the field was different. I could see it to a certain extent, but that is what the training is supposed to prepare us for. I had become an expert at compartmentalization. I’m sure that’s why they called me.

“Hey, Mr. Clemmons,” I said as I walked into the room.

“Ms. Young, please take a seat.”

I dropped my books on one of the tables and pulled a chair up to the other side of his desk. I hoped this didn’t take long.

“I’ve been looking over all the notes on your cohort. You will be done with training by summer. When I got to yours, I was surprised to see your weapons logs are severely lacking.”

“Lacking?” I gasped. “I spend more time in the stadium than anyone else! I’ve been practicing to increase my draw speed, which is already the fastest in my cohort! I…”

“Annabell… That’s enough,” he said, putting his hand up. “I can see here you are leaps and bounds above your peers in precision with a handgun, rifle, bow, and crossbow. You have set record times in stripping, cleaning, and reassembling every firearm we have given you. You have also logged more hours in the stadium just this year than most do in three.”

“So, what’s the issue?”

“You haven’t logged any hours with a spear or a sword. Your hours with throwing knives and stars are pitiful, and I don’t see anything here about improvised weapons.”

“I’m not skilled in those, but as long as I have a gun, it’s not a problem.”

“What if you don’t?”

“I’ll make sure I do,” I said, crossing my arms over my chest.

“As a Garrote, you must be infinitely prepared. Any number of things could happen to leave you unable to use one of your guns.”

“There isn’t anything I can say to convince you, is there?”

“No, there isn’t. As it stands now, you would take a very large hit to your ranking because of the deficiencies in your weapons knowledge. Your marks in most classes are very good, and a couple are serviceable. It looks like you need more hours in the simulator.”

I could feel tears welling up in my eyes. I was one of the best students this year. I should be ranked as one of the best. Just because I couldn’t handle a sword very well shouldn’t detract from that.

“Now, now. Don’t tear up on me. Here’s what I’m suggesting: I will train you personally after hours if you’re willing. You will have a bright future ahead of you, and I don’t want to see that tarnished.”

“You would do that?” I said softly.

I had never seen him be this kind before. He was known as a hardass. He yelled a lot, demanded perfection, and very rarely smiled. Occasionally you would see him nod in approval with barely a half smile, but that was about as warm as he got.

“I don’t do it often. I refuse to waste my off time on students who are not serious about progress. I see the drive in you. What you are lacking is guidance. You are very dominating for a person so small. You charge in, make quick decisions about how your time would be best spent, and divert your energy there. It’s a good quality to have in life, but not so much in training. Give me your best, and I will help you hit top marks on your weapons final.”

“I will, Mr. Clemmons. I won’t let you down.”

“I know you won’t. Take your things back to the dorms, rest up, get something to eat, and I will meet you in the stadium at 6:30 sharp.”

 

I had never eaten so quickly in my life. I brought the biggest jug I had to fill with water. I ducked out of the cafeteria as soon as I was allowed and practically ran to the stadium. It was 6 when I got there. Just enough time for me to get warmed up and lay out some weapons. I wasn’t sure what he would make me do, but I knew to be proficient with a sword, the weight of it was important. I watched one guy learn the hard way that swinging around a too-heavy sword makes you look much worse than using a lighter one.

As I was finishing my stretches and getting ready to grab weapons, Ms. Roch walked in. Her eyes flared slightly as she marched over to me with cat-like grace. She fixed me with the stare that made your soul run cold.

“It is after hours. Students cannot be here without permission. Explain yourself,” she said. 

Her words felt like barbs. The students all speculated it was some trick of spirit magic. I didn’t care how she did it; I just couldn’t stand it trained on me.

“Well, I had talked to… uh,” I started.

“It’s alright, Jacelyn,” Mr. Clemmons said as he entered. “I had planned to put the session in the system before we started, but it seems Ms. Young is early.”

She kept her gaze on me a few seconds longer. I swallowed hard, and my hands started to sweat. She turned to Mr. Clemmons.

“Will this be regular?”

“Yes. Most likely until she graduates. I will try to keep the times updated for you. However, I’m not as on top of things as Ms. Young seems to be. If you see her here, it’s probably at my request, and I will be happy to verify if need be.”

“Very well. You are a lucky student. Clemmons must see something in you. Don’t take it for granted,” she said before turning on her heel and gliding back outside.

“I should have known you would be early. From now on, you can access the stadium whenever you want, day or night, as long as your other marks don’t slip. The caveat: outside of student hours, you cannot use guns, bows, or crossbows. Deal?”

“Deal.”

“Then let’s get started.”

He grabbed a few of the smaller knives and demonstrated. He tossed it up a foot or so, caught it by the tip of the blade, and flung it across the room at a target. He hit it dead center. The first time I tried to catch it, I sliced my finger. He used his air magic to close the wound, but it wasn’t completely healed. I would be done for the night if we told the healer I had been injured. It took almost an hour for me to hit the target at all. Mr. Clemmons was more patient than I'd ever seen him. I, on the other hand, kept cursing my inability to get it right.

“Your emotions are blocking your talent, Annabell. Block them out. It’s just you and the blade. Make it an extension of your being.”

I nodded and closed my eyes. I pushed away the anger and the frustration. I pulled everything I had ever learned about meditation together. I wasn’t sure how long I stood there. He didn’t interrupt me at all. When I opened my eyes, I tried again. I hit the target. I didn’t hit dead center, but closer than I had before.

It took less and less time between throws for me to get it. I spent every minute I could on it for two weeks. I could hit the center about 80% of the time now. Mr. Clemmons was ready to move on to other skills. He said I could always practice knife throwing more, but we only had four months before rankings would be decided, and I needed to raise my proficiency in other areas.

 

I spent every moment I could in that stadium. I took in everything Mr. Clemmons said. I would not let anything hold me back from ranking high. After four months of grueling training, I got a genuine smile out of him. He looked proud. It felt like the greatest achievement of my life. I couldn’t wait until the ranks were posted. It could be anytime now. I heard a commotion in the hallway and bolted out.

“They're posting them now!” someone called out.

I took off. I needed to know if all the work I put in kept me in the top 10. There was a crowd of students around the giant poster Ms. Roch was pinning to the wall. I squeezed through to her right. As she stepped away, I scanned the names.

Second. I placed second. I couldn’t believe it. My blood was pounding through my veins, and I had to blink several times. I expected it to be high, but I knew my classroom marks needed work. I scanned the marks for all 50 students. I blew almost all of them out of the water on practicals. The only thing stopping me from the top spot was that woman destroyed my classroom marks and came in just a little below me on practicals.

I still couldn’t believe it. I slipped out of the throng of students and took off toward Mr. Clemmons's room. I barely remembered to check if he was teaching before I flung the door open.

“Second,” I yelled. “I ranked second!”

“I heard,” he said with a smile. “I’m proud of you, Annabell.”

“I couldn’t have done it without your training, Mr. Clemmons. I can’t tell you how grateful I am.”

“You did all the work; I just gave you guidance. You and you alone made this accomplishment,” he said. “I’m not your instructor anymore. We are colleagues now. You can call me Jason.”

“I still very much appreciate your help, Jason,” I said, trying it out.

I flung my arms around him and gave him a quick hug. He was surprised and didn’t know what to do with his hands. When I stepped back, he still looked concerned.

“I’m sorry, I should have asked first,” I said.

“It’s fine. I’ve just never had a student, current or former, hug me before. Congratulations, Annabell. You will achieve great things.”

Please Don't Stop the Music

♫ I just came here to party, but now we're rockin on the dance floor actin naughty ♫

Ahem, sorry. I have a new playlist and it's GREAT! I'm just sitting here on my couch, with a plate of pizza rolls, dancing. That song was first up, and it's been so long since I've heard it that I started it over. I'm feeling much better than last week. Still not super great, but the power of a new playlist is strong. Welcome to my head ^.^

The new playlist comes with NEWS! It's official, I've started writing the second book of SoF. I was struggling with the vibe a little. It just wasn't hitting right. Then I realized I was totally slacking. I didn't make it a playlist. All my books get their own. Some of the songs make it there because of lyrics, some of it is vibe, and sometimes I can just feel them for a specific scene in my head or with a certain character. Honestly, I don't know if my playlists would make sense to anyone but me. It's fine. ANYWAY. SoF book two finally got a name. Having the playlist made all the difference!

Matchstick

I'm crazy excited about it in a way I don't know if other people will see, but again, that's fine. For anyone that does get it... hopefully they are like me and it will make them geek out a little.

I have another nail update! They didn't turn out quite how I wanted them to, but I still really like them. I think that is the story of my life when it comes to my nails. I have grand ideas, and then... remember I have almost zero artistic talent. 

I have other news too! I decided I'm going all in on Matchstick. I'm using it as my goal for CampNaNo in April. Basically, I'm hoping to have the writing done by the end of April. No pressure right? Which also means I'm adding a new tag on here for CampNaNo. Might as well add stats while I go. With two camps and NaNo, I'm going to be busy. Maybe this will be the push I need to write faster. Editing is still a long, tedious, and seemingly never ending process, buuuuut if I can get the writing done faster maybe I can keep to a two books a year publishing schedule?? Does that sound crazy? It feels crazy.

I feel like there was something else I was going to say it. I'm sure I'll remember it later. Like five minutes after this actually posts... Well off to write more things 

♫ I'm a scholar and a gentleman, and I usually don't fall when I try to stand ♫

Until next week ♥

An interview- Onyx

 

“Good morning! Thank you for taking the time to sit down with me. How are you doing today?”

“It’s a beautiful day,” he said with a smile as he sat on the couch. “I feel great. What about yourself?”

“I’m doing very well, thank you. Shall we get started?”

“Please,” he said, gesturing to continue.

“How do you take your coffee?”

“Brewed strong with a splash of caramel macchiato creamer, but I do drink it black pretty often, too,” he said as he propped his ankle up on his knee.

“What dictates the choice?”

“Convenience mostly. If I’m at home, the creamer is available. Drinking it black is just easiest if I’m out on a job. No stirring required, and I don’t have to give additional instructions if someone else is grabbing it for me.”

“Where is your favorite place?”

“That’s tricky,” he said, drumming his fingers on his thigh. “There are a few places that bring me some peace. The place I spent the most time in is a little spot in the woods by train tracks. It’s recently become even more special. However, I really like bookstores. Every city I go to, I find at least one bookstore to decompress in. Grab a coffee and a book. You can just get lost for a short time. So, I guess it depends on the context of the moment.”

“That spot in the woods sounds great! What made it become more special to you recently?”

“A date with a very special girl,” he said as a smile lit up his entire face.

“Want to elaborate?”

“She is just someone very important to me. Seeing how much she loved it there… Well, it just brought me a sense of home, ya know? Have you ever experienced that?”

“I can’t say I have, but it sounds perfect.”

“It really is,” he said, leaning back and stretching his arm out over the back of the couch.

“What’s your favorite book?”

“Depends on who’s asking,” he laughed. “I usually tell people Tom Sawyer is my favorite. Sounds very adult and mature, right? I actually like anything with vampires in it. Sawyer is still a good book, don't get me wrong, I’m just fascinated by vampires. Seeing the different way they are portrayed, the lore they pull on, and how in the world they could exist.”

“I like the dichotomy of being a member of a secret sect of people while doubting there could be others.”

“Well,” he said with a Cheshire grin. “Being one of the secrets in life makes you more open to others. If something like vampires existed, we’d be the ones to know.”

“What if they do exist and know about the elementals but have the same mentality you have with humans?”

“That would be interesting, wouldn’t it? One of the reasons I like to read about them.”

“If you discover any proof, be sure to let me know.”

“Will do,” he said with a wink.

“What’s your favorite movie?”

“Hmm,” he started, tipping his head to the side. “I don’t know that I can just pick one. I tend to like comedies. With everything else in my life, it’s nice to just let go and do something fun. Happy Gilmore is a go-to. So is American Pie.”

“I’m not sure what I expected, but that wasn’t it.”

“I’m full of surprises,” he said with a grin.

“What’s a hobby you have?”

“I like cars. I like building and restoring them when I have time. I taught myself how to work on them when I was a teenager. It’s harder now, though. So much of it is computer-based. I still do it. When I get the time, I pick up the newer tools meant to help diagnose cars now.”

“What got you started?”

“I don’t really know. I always found it interesting. It was just something I wanted to do. I took an automotive class in high school, which gave me the needed stepping stones to teach myself the rest.”

“What skill do you have that might be surprising?”

“I took choir in high school, too. So I can sing pretty well. I’m not going to be winning any awards for it, but it’s a cool skill to whip out from time to time.”

“Any chance there will be a display of that in the not-too-distant future?”

He slid his foot back to the floor and leaned forward, resting his elbows on his knees. A child-like grin grew.

“There is a very distinct possibility. We’ll see how it goes.”

“I’m looking forward to it! What does the perfect vacation look like to you?”

“Time to relax with people I care about.”

“What about the location or activities you’d want to do?”

“None of that matters so much with a vacation. Sure, time on a beach is great, fancy hotels are great, but just having time without the pressures of my job with people I like to be around is a vacation in and of itself. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not going to say no to a day on the beach sipping Mai Tais, but it’s not a requirement for a good vacation.”

“What about a perfect date?”

“Hiking to somewhere beautiful, cooking over a fire, and spending the night counting stars.”

“That sounds lovely.”

“I haven’t ever been able to achieve that. Either time wasn’t on my side, or I just didn’t feel like it would be appreciated.”

“What about now?”

“We’ll see,” he said, leaning back and grinning.

“Well, thank you so much for your time. I’ll let you get back.”

“It was a pleasure,” he said as he stood and stretched. “Let’s do it again sometime.”

“I’m sure we will.”

He sauntered off and slipped out the door.

The Art of the Scramble and Other Nonsense

 Aaaaaaaah... I hate day light savings time. It's stupid, and I feel sleep deprived. Maybe it's because I'm stubborn or crazy or who knows, but it bothers me for weeks. Next week I'll still be sitting here wishing I had that hour back. It snuck up on me this year too. I wasn't expecting it and then BAM missing an hour. 

Don't mind me. I'm just salty. 

I'm also behind. Not by a lot or anything. I had hoped to be DONE with Rage edits by the time I went to bed on Monday. That is not what happened lol I had to finish it on Tuesday. Which isn't horrible, but I don't like being behind. C.O. would ask me what the worst part of having it take one day longer is. When I grumble at him something along the lines of "that I've lost a day..." he would tell me it's only one day. I'm ok, everything is ok, and I can't change it now, so I shouldn't sit around stressing about it. He would say it nicer than that. 

I'm trying. 

The trying would probably be a little easier if I could have my appointments with him back. He went to a different agency, so I had to do a little bit of internet stalking to find out where. I'm in the process of getting back in to see him, but there have been delays. I do not like delays. The delays make me want to rage and spiral and demand things work EXACTLY HOW I WANT THEM TO. 

I'm taking a deep breath and remembering that C.O. would not want me to be spiraling. So this is me. Trying not to be spiraling. (As an aside, he is aware I found him and is totally fine with it. He's seriously the best therapist I've ever had.) Hopefully soon I will have my appointments back. I feel like I'm co-dependent on my therapist. Is that normal? lol

I'm trying. I really am. This week has been particularly hard. I'm having trouble with my psychiatrist's office. There's a whole thing. It's a long complicated story, but the gist of it is: I ran out of my meds on Friday because I wasn't given enough to make it to the next appointment.  I didn't have my meds for FIVE DAYS. I got them back last night (zero help from my Dr. My pharmacist is just amazing and took the time to look back through my history and found an old script that still had refills, but it's a lower dose). I am now in the market for a new prescriber.  I cried when she told me she found an old script I could have filled. Going cold turkey off your meds is brutal. As of 3pm EST on 3.16, my Dr. still has not called in a refill. That's how insane this all is.

In happier news, Alexandria has been helping me read the Ascendance series! I dedicate about an hour of time in bed at night to read. It helps me sleep better, and it gives me my reading time back. I love reading, but sometimes I feel like I have so much else to do that I can't just sit and read. Allocating that hour has done wonders for me. I'm back into a rhythm with it, and it's awesome. 

Isn't she precious? Don't you want to just kiss her little face and touch her little nose and pet her little toes?? She loves me, I swear lol I let her lay just about anywhere she wants to and give her all her favorite scratches, and she lets me be a little obnoxious sometimes. It all works out. 

So, basically, this week has been scrambling to catch up while taking deep breaths and trying to be ok with it while doing a lot of reading with my Peanut. 

I think that's about it this week. I'm getting rambley. Shocking. I know. 

Until next week ♥

Into the Flames Excerpt 5: Dreams

 

“I thought pink was your favorite color ever?” I asked her. 

“It is! That doesn’t mean my bedroom should be painted pink. It needs to have versatility,” she said. 

“You watch way too many DIY shows.”

“Well, I’ve decided I want to be an interior designer. If you keep the walls  more neutral, except a feature wall, you can add all your personality with the accessories.”

“So you’re saying I shouldn’t have painted my walls so dark.”

“You can, and a darker blue is easier to work with than a bright pink. The darker color definitely doesn’t make your room look smaller,” she said with a grin. 

“What if I wanted it to look smaller, all in my grand expert design?”

“If you want to live in a cave, then you’ve made the right call.”

I rolled my eyes at her, and we moved more of her stuff out of the room. Hayden and I liked painting, so our parents left us to it. As we got out the last of the stuff, I carried the drop cloths and paint in. Our rooms weren’t that big, so it wouldn’t take long for the two of us to get it done. 

“This frosted gray matches my eyes and can easily be styled with anything you want,” she said as she poured the paint into the tray. 

“Whatever you say, baby sister.”

“How long am I going to be called ‘baby’?” she asked with a sigh. 

“For however many years you’re younger than me,” I said as I flicked a little bit of paint at her.

She got me back a few minutes later. She snuck up on me and painted a line right up my jaw and over my cheek.

All excepts are taken from a lightly edited first draft. They may be changed or removed entirely from the completed book. 

All the Small Things

Naming things is hard for me. I really hate it. I can create an entire universe and get super passionate about it like:

Ask me to name said world or character and I will just stare at you. So, when trying to decide the name of this weeks post, I sat here staring at my screen for a while. It was just about all the small things that were cropping up. Which, of course, got me singing some Blink 182. You're welcome. 

Since I'm always excited about them, I have a new nail update! I'm cat obsessed, and that is the current theme:

I've fallen a little behind with my editing. I was doing so well too. My sister had been wanting to move, and one of the townhouses in her complex had an opening. The place took what felt like forever to say they were approved and told her they would have a week. Great, right? Yea, well, they gave her the keys two days later and basically said, "haha jk, you have two days." It was like two and a half days, but still. We spent the middle of last week scrambling to make it happen. My mom, Naomi, and I were over there helping her. Let me tell you... Her apartment has vinyl floors laid over concrete. My dumbass thought it was a great idea to walk around barefoot all day while helping her pack. My body informed me the next day that I was definitely too old for that. We got it done, though!

Friday I was so sore and tired from all the scrambling that I accomplished getting my nails done, changing all the icons on my phone (new month, new phone screen!), and accidentally napping. That was it. I'm getting everything back on track as much as I can lol 

Tuesday is my cleaning day. I hate cleaning, I like the house clean. So, I lump all the cleaning together in one day. I mean, spot cleaning still happens. I just sweep, clean the appliances, clean the bathroom, vacuum, etc on Tuesday. Cleaning all day and grocery shopping so close to getting my knees and hamstrings to feel normal after the move was not a good call. But I did it. It is done. I am very tired and ready to spend a lot of time sitting with my laptop editing and writing. 

So, I am a little crazy and my brain just loves to give me more things to do. I've started what I'm calling A Guide to Athric (the world the Justified series is set in). It's a history of the place mixed in with a short story that threads its way through it all. It's not my top priority right now, but I do set time aside each week to work on it. There may be more updates about that coming soon-ish. 

That's probably enough rambling for today. I have a lot of stuff on my plate to get done.

Until next week ♥

When Gus Met Cassidy

 

It was another long and hot day. The training schedules were brutal, and Gus could never understand why. There hadn’t been a war in over 500 years. As much as he hated it, there had been some benefits. One of the leading families had been impressed by his skill. He had been offered a position with them. At first, he was managing their house and staff, listening to the staff from other families gossiping and other menial tasks. It had been a few years now, and he had earned his place at the table.

The Monroe name used to command respect, but after his father died, his mother fell apart. They still had their wealth, but being seen in every tavern in the city from open to close had destroyed what was left of their reputation. Gus was going to restore it. He now took meetings on behalf of Mr. Talsa. When he spoke, it was known he was speaking on behalf of the Talsa family. He still had to finish his training at the academy. If he could make it just one more year, he would never have to wield combat magic again.

Gus turned his attention back to the task at hand. He was restoring the family home himself. His mother was still spending all her time with whatever alcohol she could find, but he was now in charge of the estate. He wiped his forehead on his sleeve and went back to sanding. Once he buffed out the rough spots, he could move on to staining. All he had left to sand was the top of the railings.

“If only you had some kind of tool at your disposal that could mold that wood at the flick of a finger,” called a familiar voice.

“I like to work with my hands,” Gus replied with a smirk. “What are you doing on this end of town, Jeremy?”

“Thought I’d come by and check on you. No matter how many times you tell me you like working with your hands, I just can’t wrap my head around it.”

“It feels like more of an accomplishment this way,” Gus answered, tossing Jeremy a piece of sandpaper attached to a block. “See for yourself.”

Jeremey balked at the idea. Gus chuckled and went back to work sanding. He didn’t think it was so strange that he wanted more than just powerful magic. Sure, with a few waves of his hands, he could have the wood bent and melded to his liking in seconds. Where was the pride and accomplishment in that? He had to throw magic around violently all morning four days a week and again at the request of the Talsa family if they needed it six days a week. While at home, he just wanted to create something with his own hands.

To Gus’s surprise, Jeremy started sanding. Gus thought about commenting but refrained. It would be better to just let him have the experience. They worked in silence for another hour. The railing was almost perfect. The soft scrapping of the sandpaper had brought calm in to settle around them.

“Ok,” Jeremy said with a sigh. “I get it. It’s kind of nice. There is a little more pride in the finished product. BUT this way took hours!”

“You’ve only been here for around an hour.”

“It feels like three. And my arm hurts.”

“You get used to it,” Gus said with a grin. “Builds character.”

“I have all the character I need. Can we at least get a beer? If I’m going to be forced to stay here and do hard labor, I should at least be compensated with a nice beer.”

“No one is forcing you to stay or to do mild labor.”

Jeremy scoffed. Gus knew he would never admit to wanting to stay. So he punched him lightly in the arm and went to grab him a beer.

“I love you. You are the greatest person that has ever walked these streets,” Jeremy said as Gus handed him the beer. “You will always have a special place in my heart.”

“Has anyone told you that you’re dramatic?”

“I take pride in it,” Jeremy said before taking a long drink.

“Alright then, Drama King, are you going to help me stain the porch or not?”

“I guess. If you’re going to twist my arm."

 

They were almost done when a call from Mr. Talsa came in.

“Is there any way you can take a meeting for me tomorrow morning? I just got called away to Prush, but this is important.”

“It shouldn’t be an issue. I just need to let the academy know.”

“I’ll take care of it. They need to know it’s on my request, though, I’ll tell them it’s an order,” he said with a chuckle.

“I appreciate it. They can’t very well say no to you.”

“The benefits of my friendship,” he said. “You’re really helping me out here. I won’t forget it.”

“It’s my pleasure to help.”

They ended the call, and Gus turned to finish up but realized Jeremy had taken over. He was concentrating intensely on getting it right. He felt a sense of pride well up in him. Jeremy had become a lot like a little brother. Helping him find his way made Gus feel like he was making a real difference in the world. This was the first time he actually offered to help with something this close to manual labor. He knew better than to expect this level of investment all the time.

“I think it’s done,” Jeremy said as he looked around.

“I’d say so,” Gus answered.

“What might it take to get a hot meal?”

“I think I can make that happen,” Gus said, slinging his arm around his shoulders. “You did good, kid.”

“Kid?” Jeremy laughed. “You’re like four years old than me!”

“And decades smarter.”

 

He was going to be a little early for the meeting, but early was always better than late. He slowed his horse down to meander through the streets. He got the details of the meeting shortly after he got up. It was a routine meeting. Meet, kiss ass, make a pitch, and then wait for them to call. Talsa was in the process of developing some new tech. Gus didn’t understand it all, but he didn’t need to. That wasn’t his job here. All he knew was that it preserved a small amount of magic from creation to perform whatever task. It was genius. The magic wouldn’t last forever, and you’d have to pay to have it recharged. Something about the magic from the power grid wouldn’t give it the enchantment that made the things work.

Usually, Gus was just there to talk up the company and the family, answer general questions, and make the potential client feel special. He could do that easily enough. Afterward, Talsa met to discuss tech details and broker a deal.

His mind continued to wander as he looked around. Something, or rather, someone, caught his attention. She was beautiful. She was walking along one of the balconies above him. She was in an elaborate dress that seemed much too formal for this early in the morning. She wasn’t paying any attention to the street. She was talking to a young woman walking next to her. She laughed and took off running. He had never seen anything like it. She was just so free.

She spun around and called out to her friend. She must have felt him watching her because she turned and looked right at him. She raised her hand, and he thought she was waving to him. That’s when he collided with a sign and managed to knock himself off the horse. The wind had been knocked out of him, so he just lay there for a minute to assess.

“Are you alright?” a voice called down.

“Probably,” Gus answered.

“Should be more careful,” he heard as he sat up.

He looked around and saw the woman leaning against the railing, trying to contain a smile. He raised one hand to her as he jumped back up to his feet. He was going to have a lump on the side of his head. He looked up to the balcony again. The woman waved, letting her smile shine through.

Before he could say anything else, she turned and continued on with her friend. He had a meeting to get to.

I get a LOT of help when I sit on the couch to work

The Weather Outside Is...

 Horrible. Terrible. I'm over winter. I realize it's February in Michigan. I also realize winter isn't going anywhere for months. We literally get snow in April. The snow can be really pretty. If it could just refrain from landing on the sidewalks, driveways, and roads... that would be ideal. I'm just grumpy. I know. All the pressure changes have been doing crazy things to my allergies and my head. I'm ready for 75 and sunny. 

I've been watching a lot of home reno shows lately. I like seeing everything come together, but some of the choices made are... weird. Like, one of the design options added a bathroom to the house, but it would put the master suite and the pre-teens bedroom on different floors of the house. Y'all, they turned it down! How do you turn a full sized spa like bathroom?? I was stunned. 

I feel like the Twittering is going well, but I'm not so great at the LinkedIn lol So that one is going to exist, but probably not get used much. The blog posts have been steady. So yay me keeping on top of a thing!! 

Ok, I'm off to more editing related things. Until next week! ♥

Rage Cover Reveal!

 As the book progressed, I had a vague idea of what the cover might be. However, I was open to anything. My mom asked if she could have free rein on it. She's a fantastic artists, so of course I told her she could. She hand drew the image and did some digital enhancements. I'm pretty excited about it! So, I present to you: The cover of Rage!

Social Media?

 Turns out, I'm terrible at social media. I mean, I'm not all that surprised by it. I bailed on all social media except Reddit a long time ago. I apparently had a Twitter (I don't remember making one...) so I've updated it to reflect all the new writery stuff, followed a bunch of writery people, and we're gunna see how that goes. I'm trying to keep up a LinkedIn too. I feel like a cranky old lady and I'm only in my early 30s. How am I supposed to manage being active on Twitter, LinkedIn, and this blog while keeping up with the working, the parenting, and the homeschooling? Plus I should probably clean my house and cook food on occasion too. 

If you want to follow me on either, whether it's to keep updated or watch me attempt to make this work (o.o) here's my LinkedIn and Twitter.

Alexandria would like me to inform you this is a very hard house to live in. The people are always doing things, and of course, this means they need to be supervised. People cannot be trusted to just do things on their own. Kitty help is a must! After a very long day helping me deep clean the house, she just cannot go on. She's very overworked. Poor thing.

I was really happy with my Valentine's Day nails. The aforementioned cleaning resulted in some damage. They only lasted about eight days. Of course, I had to do them again. I decided to go super colorful this time. I did not think it all the way through... It took me like five hours to get them all done. Whiiiich put me behind on editing. My therapist says that's fine because self-care is important and my nails make me happy. He's probably right, even though I grumble about it all the time. My inner anxiety just likes to remind me that I set ambitious goals the last two weeks and is keeping score of how far behind I have become. I'm working on it. My nails are cute, though! Here's to hoping they last!

Aleiant: The Map

 I'm excited to show off the map of Aleiant! I drew up the original map in excel (what can I say, I love spreadsheets...). After that, I did a mock up in Paint, and it definitely didn't look like a small child did it. Luckily I am related to a fantastic artist that is willing to do things for me! So, my mom drew me the map!

She hand drew the whole thing, scanned it into to her computer, did some editing there, and printed this for me to put in my series bible! She has to do something else to it before finalizing the file itself to go in the book. I'm in love with this map!

Color Me Productive

 

First, Valentine's Day nails! I usually do my nails every two-ish weeks. Sometimes I do them a little sooner, it just depends on how well they are holding up. However, as cute as Valentine's Day stuff is... I actually hate it as a holiday. "Lets hype up a romantic day so much that it becomes stressful and everyone ends up disappointed!" Doesn't that sound great! I just wish so many people didn't mark it as an important milestone to judge the status of their relationship. I've had friends talk about it (from all genders) and now I hear my 17 year old daughter talk about it. Take the pressure off guys. One day of the year shouldn't decide the fate of your relationship. Ok, I'm done now.

I have been more productive in the last couple weeks than I had been in a while. I'm really digging it. I've had so much crazy in my life that maintaining a schedule and making plans seemed like an effort in futility. Hitting this kind of stride is a huge deal for me, so I always try to make the best of it. I have bi-polar disorder. I've been medicated for a little over a year now (I wasn't for a long time after a bad reaction to one set of meds). It really does help me a lot, but it isn't a cure. Toss in the ADHD and anxiety and you've got a party. I've started talking about it more because it's something that should be talked about. 

Even when medicated, I live in constant flow of peaks and valleys. My "normal" floats somewhere above or below what neuro-typical people experience as "normal". I see my therapist every week and he is super great. Even when I tell him that I'm pretty sure he has to tell me he's proud of what I am accomplishing (even when I feel like I have accomplished nothing) because it's in the secret social work rule book and he tells me there isn't a rulebook, secret or otherwise, of what he has to stay to his clients, but, like, that sounds like something the secret rulebook would say you have to say if the secret rulebook is brought up, doesn't it? Doesn't it?? 

Anyway, he puts up with me, he pushes me to challenge the stupid give up thoughts and make them into stupid go-to thoughts and it's helping. Even when I grumble about how if things would just work exactly how I want them to... I wouldn't be stressed out! So, I like to take full of advantage of these moments when my mind is clear and my drive is strong. I'm trying to get as many posts, and news, and whatever else queued up before the downswing comes in. These weekly more personal ones (what will most likely stay as Thursday) are done up either Sunday or Monday. So if they go missing for a little while...Well, they'll come back when I get my shit back together again.

Until next week! ♥

Two of my babies! Alexandria (Peanut) 4, Spade 20

I thought I was going to work. Peanut decided I was not.

When I work on the couch... sometimes it gets a little crowded.. (Turtle 4, is the middle, he's Xander's bio brother!)

It's a SnuggeryStickers Kind of Day

 I’ve posted on here about it before, but I love my planner. I personally use the Happy Planner, but I think all planners are amazing. I am only at peak productivity when I use my planner to map out the week. I sit down on Sundays (or sometimes Monday mornings) and plan out everything that needs to be done. From writing to chores to meals to appointments (and, tbh, parenting stuff ends up in there too). That said, I have always struggled to find writer stickers I liked. I mean, there are some, but they were all either too big, too small, too monotone, or too… something else. I just want to be Goldilocks, ok? I found some super amazing ones, and of course, the shop closes (I feel for her, we had a chat at one point, and some serious family stuff came up).

Since then, my mom has listened to me complain about writer stickers. A lot. So, being the super fantastic and creative mommy she is… she made me some. She has a Circuit, so once she got them designed, it was easy for her to keep supplying me when needed. Then, she asked me if I thought other people would buy them. It’s a resounding YES! She created a few different kinds of stickers, too (caregiver ones, cat lover ones, and woman DIY ones, too!). Her writer stickers are her best sellers. In my opinion, they are the best ones out there. I might be a little biased, though ;) If you are a writer or know a writer that needs stickers… send them to SnuggeryStickers on Etsy!

Published: Into the Flames

 The day has finally come! Into the Flames is officially published! I'm really happy I was able to make it happen today, my grandma's birthday. I'm very grateful for the people in my life that have helped me along the way. I have a lot of plans to for the future, here's to making them happen! 

It's available in print and as an ebook at Barnes and Noble and as an ebook  Smashwords!

How to Not Lose Your Mind

I'm really good at losing my mind. It's my superpower. However, this week, I'm working on not doing that... Meet my organization system! One is my planner. I use it to, well, plan. At least the important stuff, but sometimes the small stuff too. It really depends on how the week is going. Some weeks I need to be reminded to wash my hair. Other weeks I'm basically superwoman. It's really hit or miss.



The other two I call my Series' Bibles. These are where ALL the stuff from my books go. Everything from character descriptions, plot points, world building things, notes, lists of extras I want to produce, and soooo much more. I'm trying to get all my ducks in a roll. Some of them keep getting distracted. It's a work in progress. I'll let you know how it goes.

Fancy Meeting You Here...

 

It has become very apparent that I'm horrible at maintaining a blog! I always come out here with grand intentions of being right on top of everything… so far, it hasn’t been going as planned. But! Just because there is a lag in content here doesn’t mean I’m not doing the writing/editing thing. Things have gone a little off the rails here in other ways. After a lengthy battle with Naomi’s school over their refusal to protect her from bullies (she was literally cornered into a bathroom, held against the wall, and threatened more than once) and their inability to accommodate her cognitive processing disorder… I’m now homeschooling her. It’s been interesting, to say the least. However, she has made more progress with me in five months than she did in almost eight years in trad school. The rant I could give you about the ways kids with a different approach to learning are treated by school systems is long and full of obscenity. We are in a better rhythm now, so I have dedicated work time again (instead of hard cramming it in on nights and weekends). I have plans to keep the blog up again. We’ll see how that goes.

On to book things! Into the Flames is officially ready to go out once I have a finalized cover! The cover is almost done too! I decided to smoosh the two short stories into the book rather than publish them separately. It’s still rougher than I would like it to be, but I think that’s ok. I’m seriously hoping Into the Flames will be published on February 13. It should be, buuuut we’ll see!

I’m working on final edits to Rage. My beta readers have been amazing and have pointed out a small mountain of things that need to be addressed. It’s a little overwhelming at times, but all of it will make Rage better. I’m excited to get it all polished up and things!

So! Here’s to a better-maintained blog and speedy edits!

PS. I'm starting a new thing with pictures either at the beginning or end of the posts. Why? I think it sounds like a good idea lol

I've started trying to keep my nails done. I feel better when I do, and, I mean, they look nice! It helps that I have LED UV light and gel polish so I can do it myself! 

I've also started changing up my phone screen for each month! (Don't mind the calendar, figured I should remove the names from my schedule!)

Into the Flames Excerpt 4: The Dinner

 I had almost forgotten that Onyx and I were supposed to fight and we were halfway through dinner. This was going to be amusing, because I was the only one that knew the fight was a set up.

I decided I would get up to get more tea when it was time, so I picked up the glass and finished it off. I looked up to watch Onyx and find something to fight with him about. I noticed his elbows were on the table. That was about the only thing I could see that wouldn’t be completely out there.

“Do your elbows really need to be on the table?” I said to Onyx with a glare.

He looked momentarily shocked, then he looked down.

“I didn’t realize they were on the table.”

I lowered my voice to almost a whisper since he was right next to me, but I made sure it was still loud enough for everyone to hear.

“I bring you over here so you can get to know my parents and then you disrespect them in their house.”

“Harley, dear, it's ok. It looks like it was just an accident,” my mother said looking confused.

“No,” I said, “It’s not. I thought he had better manners than that.” I stood up abruptly and grabbed my glass. “I think I need more tea.”

Everyone else was too busy looking anywhere, but at Onyx and I, they didn’t see me wink at him. A glimmer of question flipped across his eyes, but he didn’t say anything.

All excerpts are taken from a lightly edited first draft. The contents here may or may not make in to the final product as written here.

Into the Flames Excerpt 3: Beginnings

 At that moment we pulled up to the parking lot Onyx’s car was in, and I was speechless. Without another word he got out of the car and started to walk over to his. I put the car in gear, rolled down the window, and pulled up next to him.

“Onyx?”

He turned around and bent down to my window. I quickly wrapped my arm around his neck and kissed him the same way he kissed me in the garage. I pulled away, smiled, and took my foot off the break. The look on his face as I drove away was priceless.

Again, for some unknown reason, I felt like I had known him my whole life. I had never been so comfortable with someone before. I couldn’t wait to see him again tomorrow.

Right at that moment my phone went off. At the next light I pulled it out of my pocket, a text from Onyx.

Pick you up at your house at 3:00 tomorrow.

I didn’t know why he needed to pick me up. We were supposed to have dinner at my house at 6:30. So I responded:

Dinner is at 6:30.

He responded pretty quickly, but the light changed, so I had to wait until the next one before I could read it, and of course all the rest of the lights were green. As soon as I pulled into the garage I pulled my phone out.

I know.

That was all he said… I had to smile.

Okay, as long as we’re back in time.

Don’t worry we will be.

Are you always so vague?

Maybe :)

Are you going to tell me where you are taking me, Mr. Fielding?

Nope, you will just have to wait and see. So what are your plans for the evening Ms. Jennings?

Nothing really, just relaxing. How about you?

Same thing. Have a good night, darling.

You too.

All excerpts are taking from a lightly edited draft. The contents may or may not make it into the final product as written here.

My Editing Assistant Has a Wet Nose

Massive edits are probably my least favorite part of the process. I love writing. I love engaging with readers. I love formatting and layouts. I severely dislike editing. However, when I need to do big edits, I have a lot of help. When I'm ready to be done for the day, Alexandria (Peanut) steps right in. In my opinion, she's the cutest and most accurate editor anyone could hope to have. 

Into the Flames Excerpt 2: The Fire

 I woke up choking.

When I opened my eyes there was smoke everywhere. A set of large hands shot at me through the dark and ripped me from the bed. Without thinking I struck out with my leg, and I fell to the floor.

“Harley! It’s Arthur!”

I could hear the smoke alarm blaring in the background and I continued to cough.

“Use your air magic, pull clean air to your face!” Arthur yelled through the chaos. “When you can breathe, use your fire magic to slow the fire down!”

“Ok,” I croaked as I followed him from the room.

We went into his bedroom and he lifted the rug, once he got the panel open, he had me go down first.

“Why…are we…down…here!” I yelled between coughs. “We will…burn…to death!”

“This room doubles as a bunker,” he replied. “We will be fine down here. I'm going to call your dad and let him know what's going on. Sit down and catch your breath. If you can, do your best to keep the damage to a minimum. I’m sure one of the neighbors has called the fire department.”

I sat down and reached for my fire magic. I coaxed it to slow down. I used every ounce of energy I had to try to contain the fire, but it was massive and I didn’t have enough control. Once Arthur was off the phone, I felt him gather up some air and send it out. I listened for it to come back. The fire department was here.

This excerpt was taken from a lightly edited first draft. All content here may be changed or removed from the final book. 

Into the Flames Excerpt 1: Onyx

 When I was almost finished eating, I saw someone watching me from the other side of the river. He was in the fountain and partially hidden. Something about him drew my attention. I had an overwhelming need to talk to him. Part of it was driven by the need to know why he was watching me so intently, the other part I couldn’t explain. I finished the last few bites of pizza and tossed the container in one of the trash bins. I walked back over to Saginaw St., and across the river. I could feel his eyes on me the whole time. I carefully made my way down to the concrete fountains and falls.

He was tall and lean. He had short, rumpled, light brown hair, and amazing deep blue eyes, which further showed off his handsome face. He was wearing black dress slacks and a cream button up dress shirt, but he was barefoot in a fountain…watching me.

“Aren’t you afraid you’re going to mess up your pants?” Yep, that was the first thing out of my mouth. Wonderful.

He slowly raked his eyes up my body. Black skateboard shoes, long legs, covered only by cut off denim shorts, with a band t-shirt that was slightly too big. He took in every detail of my face, studying me like there was going to be a test later. He was silent for so long I was starting to get uncomfortable.

“Not in particular. I can always change my pants,” he said with a grin.

“Harley,” I breathed. His voice struck a chord in me. I couldn’t help but to smile back at him.

“Onyx. It’s nice to meet you.”

When he shook my hand I felt a spark and flinched slightly. I can read thoughts, but only through physical contact. I had hoped to figure out why he was watching me. For some reason I couldn’t. That had never happened before. Interesting.

In a secret world of elemental control, I was in my own secret corner. Hayden is the only other person that has my particular talent that I know of. We try to keep it under tight wraps; we don’t want people trying to use us, even in our own community of Elementals. Hayden and I had learned that the two of us, if we focus really hard, can send thoughts back and forth without having to touch or be close together for that matter. We tried sending them to other people but that didn’t work.

“So, Onyx, why are you standing in the middle of a fountain, with pants on no less?” No one can say I’m not direct.

“Just thought I would enjoy the view. Besides, the water is cold; I thought it would be nice to cool off for a few minutes,” his grin was wide as ever.

“It is beautiful here,” I said. “I used to play here as a kid.”

“I wasn’t talking about the park, my dear.”

With that he turned and walked away, vaulting out of the fountain with more grace than a cat. I stood there for a moment stunned at the abruptness of his departure.

“Wait!” I yelled as I started to run after him.

I took three steps before my foot slipped. I tumbled out of the fountain and into the river. When I came up to the surface I saw him standing on top of the concrete bank chuckling.

“You could come help me, you know.”

“Ah, but that might mess up my pants.”

He flashed me a grin and walked off, still chuckling. Great.

This excerpt was taken from a lightly edited first draft. All content here may be changed or removed from the final book. 

Beta and Edits

 After a couple severe illnesses and some personal matters came into play... I am back on here! I have been pushing through with the writing/editing processes! It's been a journey for sure!

Rage is officially up for beta (and has been for about three weeks now)! I'm most likely running the beta through early October. After that I need to push it over to my editor (who is also my cover artist, yay for knowing a professional graphic designer/corporate editor). My mom is still working on drawing the map up for me. Right now it is still just a loose, and kind of sad, paint drawing. I'm seriously hoping for a February release date. My grandma's birthday is February 13th. We lost her this past December She was one of the greatest human beings I've ever known. She was the second person to buy the first thing I ever published (beaten out only by my mom). She always made sure I knew she was proud of me. She is greatly missed, and it would mean a lot to me to dedicate the publication of one of my books to her.

Into the Flames is more than halfway through the massive overhaul I'm putting it through. Even with all the changes I've made to it, it still doesn't quite sound like the writer I have become. I've decided it will just have to be acceptable enough. The second book in the series will sound a lot more like me as I am now. 

Looking forward, the second book in the Spirit of Fire series is up next. Once I have that written and out there for beta and edits, I'll be jumping back to Justified. This blog should start getting back to regularly scheduled posts soon. I'm still trying to find my rhythm again after all of the crazy of the past few months (thanks to scheduling way in advance, the posts continued on for a while after I had to take a step back). 

Rage Excerpt 13: The Interrogation

 I assessed him a minute, glanced to Lexi, and tipped my head toward the door. She only hesitated a minute before getting up and leaving the room. After the door closed behind her, I waited a minute longer. The prisoner was still laughing. I’ve been told I have “Alpha blood” in me. Time to test that. Hopefully Lexi got the hint and would keep Nic and Ty out.

I took a slow deep breath and flicked my wrist, yanking the chair out from underneath him and shattering it against the wall behind him. I leaned back and crossed my arms. He was on the floor, awkwardly trying to get up since his hands were still chained to the top of the table.

Once he was on his feet, he tried to yell something at me, but squinted at the collar on his neck and tightened it. I steeled myself for what was next. Nic was going to kill me if this guy didn’t.

I waved my hand absentmindedly, snapping the chain that was connecting him to the table. He started to move toward me, and I let him.

“You want to know why he “bows” to me?” I asked, with a calm only years of practice had given me. His hands reached out to my neck, and I let them get within inches. I seized the steel cuffs with my magic and yanked them straight up into the air, so quickly and violently he cried out as the strain on his shoulders intensified.

“You see, he didn’t find me very intimidating either. Until he went head to head with me.” He was on his tiptoes, unable to pull his hands back down. I tightened the steel so his wrists couldn’t slide through. I hadn’t moved at all from the causal pose I had taken up when I sent Lexi out. “I want information. You are going to give it to me. Whether it’s by sitting at this table or getting slowly pulled apart by my friends.”

Just as quickly as I flung his cuffs into the air, I slammed them down almost to the ground, bringing him to his knees. I stood up and took a step closer to him. He raised his head defiantly as I stood over him.

“Look at that. It’s your turn to bow.” I walked in a slow circle around him, concealing my shaking hands. “You’ve got 30 seconds to make that decision before I fling your cuffs to the ceiling and invite them in to do as they please.”

“You bitch…” he started.

“Yes, I know. I’m told I can be quite the pain in the ass.”

“I won’t give you anything. Send the wolf in and I will tell him what he wants to know.”

I flicked my wrist and brought his cuffs up to waist height, watching as he struggled to stand. I looked him right in the eye before tipping my head to one side.

“I have that effect on people. Sure you can talk to him. If I’m not happy though…” I clicked my tongue.

I moved his cuffs slowly over to the table, then made the chair I had been sitting in zoom over to his side. Once he sat down, I scooted him and fused the cuffs to the table.

“Be right back,” I said brightly.

As soon as I closed the door behind me, I doubled over. My hands and legs shaking violently. I heard the door to the viewing room open, and wasn’t able to hide the shaking. It was Lexi, with a gleam in her eye.

“The boys would like a word with you,” she said formally.

I shook myself, literally and physically, and nodded to her. I straightened my spine, capped my emotions, and braced for the whirlwind that was about to come out of that door.

This excerpt was taken from a lightly edited first draft. All content here may be changed or removed from the final book.